Wednesday, September 15, 2010

MARRIAGE IS LIKE STAR WARS...
(NOTE: Star Wars, it's characters, places and things are all copyrighted and trademarked by Lucasfilm and are referenced herein solely for the purpose of discussion and critique. Please don't sue me George!)


So it struck me this morning, being a dad, married... it's all like Star Wars.

I used to be a single guy, trying to make my way in the universe. I had a best friend I paled around with. Then a Princess came into my life. At least she thinks she's a Princess. And like Leia, while she has no royal standing, her parents treated her like one. Sadly though, after this scruffy looking nerf herder got married, the Princess turned into Jabba the Hut. Now, that's not a fat remark or anything. I'm sure most women would say it was a fat joke. No, I'm referring to Jabba's lifestyle. Laying around, watching others, watching TV... not doing a whole helluva lot.

And just try and screw something up. Your wife may not put a price on your head, but it can sure feel that way.

Then there's the droids. Or "kids", if you prefer. I have a tall golden (haired) kid, and a short, noisy kid. And while this man's best friend may walk on four legs instead of two, doesn't speak english, is covered in fur and annoyingly never leaves my side, she's no Chewbacca. If only dogs could be more like Wookies.

And while you may not be shuttling around some old geezer and a teenager from some backwater Rim world, you probably have the inlaws around a lot.

Being a dad is a lot like being Han Solo. A lot is expected of you. From smuggling the kids off to school in less than twelve parsecs, to having old debts to pay off. Sure, as a Dad, you wanted to be a fancy Jedi, but in the end, you're shooting through life in some piece of junk you've heavily modified, sometimes wishing you could switch the kids off like droids, or that Jabba the Wife really would freeze you in carbonite, so you wouldn't have to listen to the griping anymore.

I suppose there are worse characters you could end up as. I just wish I really did have a good blaster by my side.

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